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Learn To Do What?! 10 Strange ‘For Dummies’ Manuals

In Lists, Non-Fiction, Self-Help, WTF by Melanie Weaver

For Dummies manuals are awesome; who doesn’t love an in-depth, easy-t0-understand guide to teach them all about something they’ve been dying to learn to do? These titles, though, will leave you shaking your head; check them out!

 

1. Baby Massage For Dummies by Joanne Bagshaw and Ilene Fox

Baby massage is supposed to cure a whole plethora of ailments according to this guide. Mostly, it just looks creepy, though. And who needs a guide to teach them how to touch their baby, anyway?

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

2. Elvis For Dummies by Susan Doll

If you’re enough of an Elvis fan to buy a book about him, I don’t think you’re a “dummy” on the topic, to be honest. And does a celebrity really require a manual? What are you learning to do?

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

3. Mindfulness For Dummies by Shamash Alidina

Okay, I know part of this manual teaches relaxation techniques, but doesn’t it seem a little oxymoronic to teach a “dummy” to be mindful?

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

4. Wilderness Survival For Dummies by John Haslett and Cameron Smith

If you find yourself in a wilderness survival situation, and you need a For Dummies manual, you’re not going to survive. Sorry.

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

5. Facebook For Dummies by Carolyn Abram

Millions of people have managed to figure out how to use Facebook without any help at all. First, is there really enough to learn about Facebook to fill an entire book? Second, who on earth thinks they need to read an entire book to figure out how it works?

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

6. Sex For Dummies by Dr. Ruth K. Westheimer

Not touching this one. Suffice it to say, if you feel that you need to read a For Dummies manual about it, you probably don’t have to worry about encountering a situation where you need that manual.

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

7. Forensics For Dummies by D. P. Lyle

What untrained layperson is expecting to land in a situation where they need to act as a CSI? Unless you’re Jessica Fletcher, this is not going to happen to you.

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

8. Building Beehives For Dummies by Howland Blackiston

If you’re a “dummy,” and you’re adding bees to that situation, no one wants to be your neighbor.

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

9. String Theory For Dummies by Andrew Zimmerman Jones and Daniel Robbins

It’s because they talk about it on Big Bang Theory, isn’t it? String Theory takes a PhD in Physics to understand. You’re not mastering it with a For Dummies manual.

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

10. Getting an IT Help Desk Job For Dummies by Tyler Regas

Study Computer Science. Apply for jobs. Appear competent in an interview. How much more could there be?

Source: Amazon

Source: Amazon

There you go, folks. If you want to learn how to do any of these things, I suggest you don’t tell anyone about it.

YouTube Channel: Dummies.com

 

Featured image via The Bean Counter